Reading, Writng, and Research

From the readings in the Vision Quest book on writing, research, and reading I have learned some new things on each topic. In the writing section, I really never knew how to become better writer, but it sure did answer my question. To become a better you have to keep writing a lot. It may seem like common sense but I have never realized this fact.

In the section of reading, I also learned that reading was used as a remedy to make one's life better with themselves and with God. Of course the Bible can help you be in better relationship with God, but all other types of readings can change a relationship of another by reading their writings. By reading a person's writing you can step into their worldview and take a look at how they see things.

You can agree with their worldview, or at times you can disagree. Only by reading are you able to get different views and try understanding them. I knew that research was just more in depth reading, and I have known that for years now. But taking the correct steps for the correct research, it can be very beneficial.

All the things that I wouldn't do

"If you always thought about all of the things that you had to do in an entire day, you wouldn't get up in the morning." This statement was said by a very bright man. A man who I met in my first year of college. He was my history teacher, and for some reason today I couldn't get his quote out of my head. I remember the day that he said it, but I don't remember why exactly he said it. I don' think that it has anything to do with history at all. But I don't care! It's still a great line.

I mean think about it. Say that you have five classes in one day. You probably dread that day but you still do it because you have to. Now let's say that with that, you have to go to the gym, and you have a part-time job. If you sit in bed the night before thinking about all of these things, then the next morning you might find yourself laying in bed for the whole day. Instead of doing thinking about all of your tasks for the day you should, instead, take your day a step at a time. Take the day as it comes to you and just basically live your life to the fullest. The Good Book (The Christian Bible) mentions that during Lent season you should not show signs of sorrow because of sacrifice. You should exactly go around with a smile on your face so that no one can even know that you're in a state of sacrifice.

So when you have a long day ahead of you try not to be in a bad mood from the start. It actually helps your day go by much faster and better.Why did I right this, I don't know. But I thought that everyone should know about this.....For some reason that I don't know

If I can only tell the future

If I was able to tell the future I would use it for only one thing. I mean I know that I would probably use it for a lot of other things, but right I have one real concern. This is to know where I am going to be right after I finish college. I might get a good job and start making plenty of money real fast. This is something that almost everyone wants, so I cant sit here and lie to you that money doesn't mean that much too me. Because it is a big part of life, whether you like it or not.

On the other hand I can even not finish college and be left without a job. Especially a job that doesn't pay well at all. This situation, I think, is the worst outcome. Now is the time when I wish I had some type of special powers to look into the future. Having this gift is very beneficial. It's beneficial because if you can see that you are going to struggle in the future, you can find ways to ease those struggles.

The fact that I will not succeed is one of the worst things that I have in the back of my mind. If I do make through all of college but I still don't find a good job would be very heartbreaking. There really isn't a way (that I know of) to make sure that I will be "very" successful in life. If there, please let me know because that would make my life ten times easier.

I just won't be able to stand the fact that if I work my butt off through college and some way some how I still can't get that dream job.

Dewey's Quote

At this very instant, I'm not really sure what John Dewey means by chains. By chains, he can by trying to say something like something holding down a person. It may also mean having something right in front of you but it is hard to get to because of its chains. So in fact, you have to work harder to get to that something.

Now the two facts that I have mentioned can be, and is probably wrong. But I have come up with a new idea in which why Dewey wrote this. What he means by chains is probably having a family. Your family, for the most part stay together and is very hard to break, like a chain. We get used to this "chain" because family is always there for you when times are hard. When those chains are removed, we tend to miss them.

Intelligent Self Direction

To me, intelligent self-direction means that some way some how I can learn things on my own. I have the ability as a student to learn something on my own, but there is an ingredient that I need. This ingredient is a teacher. I believe that a teacher is needed only to help guide you on this direction. It is obvious that a teacher knows a lot, and if he/she doesn't then at least that person knows a little bit about something. The intelligent self-direction will not work unless you have some guidance. But too much guidance would just counter the idea of self-direction.

Other things needed

I think that are four things that are needed for this class. The first thing is an open mind. Sources such as people in which you can access at all time. The third thing that you may need can be a sense of what to know about more thing, therefore you question a lot more. The last thing that you need, and it is something that I think is important is the ability to want to write and to research.

Pancakes

A lot of people love pancakes. But I think that pancakes are really over rated. Everyone loves places like IHOP and other diners of the sort, but I'm really such a big fan of it. I mean the taste of pancakes just makes me sick. Every pancake that I have ever tasted always had that same old taste. It's a dry taste and at times you are able to taste the flour that was used to make the pancake. They are just something that is not for me.

I would rather have french toast on any day. French toast is so much better and I know a lot of people who still prefer pancakes. but those people are wack. So next time that you go to IHOP, do not order that pancakes. Order the french toast because by eating it your day would go by so much better.

*Results may vary

Thank God

Thank God for spring break. I really need this break for some reason. Most of the upper class men that I know say that the spring semester goes by really fast, but I disagree. For some reason this semester is dragging a lot and the each day goes by really slow. It could be because I can't wait for summer but in the summer I actually have to get a steady jog. And that sucks because I was just want to hang out. But at the same time if I were to stay at home the whole summer and do nothing, I would probably feel like garbage.

Back to school feeling so long this semester; it really stinks and that's why I'm glad that we have this week off. This week I'm just going to relax and nothing even think about school at all. The only school work that I am going to be doing is blogging. Blogging is actually fun at times so it's not that bad. But I refuse to pick up a book and read. I'll leave that until I go back to school where I actually I have to read something. I wish that we can read some cool stuff in college like, I don't even know, just something better than what we already read.

So this spring break I going to be awesome and I know that it is going to go by very fast. I know it already....

Gotta Stay In Shape

Staying in shape is one of the hardest things that a person can do. I mean especially while you are in college.

It's probably so hard because of several reasons. The first reason that I can give you is the food at dining hall and other places around campus. I'm not saying that it is bad or anything like that, but it's just very unhealthy. Sometimes they may have some vegetables of some sort but usually its very unhealthy food. Another reason is because people are just plain lazy (like myself) and decide not to go to the gym. Listen, it's hard when the gym is all the way across campus and you live in Donovan Hall which is the furthest from it. If people asked my I didn't go to the gym on a certain day I would usually respond with an excuse like, "man it's to cold" or " I'm just too tired."

But enough is enough. People in college have to start getting back into shape. The whole freshman fifteen really scared me to death. I just can't see myself gaining fifteen pounds. And for those who have gained some weight, just try to hit the gym as much as possible. At least try going 3 times a week. Then hope fully it gets easier and easier as times goes by.

I think that staying in shape is very important. When you're in shape you feel good about yourself and life is a lot better.

Final Draft Of My Report

Divorce

Divorce is something in today’s world that occurs frequently, and its rate is still rapidly growing. I’m going to start off by giving you some of my viewpoints on divorce and how it has affected me. Both of my parents divorced each other when I was around the age of fifteen. Some say that it is better to have your parents divorce when you are younger because you are not at the age to know exactly what is going on. Rather in my case, I was well at the age to know what horrible situation was going on with my parents. At the time I knew what was going on but my little sister, who was about eleven years old wasn’t able to comprehend what exactly was going on. For her it was actually better, due to the fact that she still had a couple of years to realize that her parents were not going to be with each other anymore.

You see, I don’t want to say that I am a brilliant kid, but I knew that something was not right with my parents. Maybe some parents are better than others when it comes to hiding the fact that their relationship is diminishing. It can even be that they want their older kids to see that things aren’t the same way that they used to be. When this happens it is usually a time for a change. In a way, I think that this is better to do because in the long run it is better for the children. It sounds crazy but I think that it is smart because the element of surprise can be very crucial and someone can end up getting hurt badly. For instance, I had never known that my parents where going through these hard times. The last thing that I was thinking about was that they needed to be separate from each other during this so called hard times. When it came time for me to find out that they could no longer be together it would have destroyed me. The only difference is that it did not occur because I was wise enough to know that a change needed to happen or else the atmosphere in the house would not get any better.

When the day came for my mother to tell me what is exactly was going on, I just brushed it off like nothing ever happened. I still tried to continue my life the way that I had been living it. Receiving the whole speech from my mother seemed like none of what happened was her fault. I felt like she was trying to tell me that the reason for all this was because of my father and all of his actions. Once again as a wise teenager I knew that this couldn’t be his entire fault; but who was I to try to determine who was right and who was wrong. I was just a kid trying to figure out why his parents who he loved dearly didn’t love each other nearly as much as they used too. Now, when it came down to my father telling me what was going on with him and his soon to be ex-wife, I actually got the same speech of how it wasn’t his fault. He said that the way that my mother was acting wasn’t right. Hearing both sides of the story made me think about something that I couldn’t get off my mind. If they both were blaming each other, how am I ever going to find out who was wrong and who was right. This is something that still haunts me today and hopefully one day I will realize what went wrong with these two people.

Divorce is a judicial declaration dissolving in whole or in part, especially one that releases the husband and wife from all matrimonial obligations. (dictionary) With this definition, many are able to see a husband’s and wife’s relationship dissolving from a long period of time before the actual divorce comes into play. A divorce can be compared with an annulment, which is a declaration that claims a marriage to no longer exist but the effects of marriage can be recognized in such organizations like child custody, child support, and distribution of property. In the twentieth century, divorce rates have sky rocketed in many developed countries. The countries in which divorce has become quite common has been the United States, South Korea, and members of the European Union. The acceptance of the single parent family has resulted in many women deciding to have children outside of marriage, as there is little remaining social stigma attached to unwed mothers in some societies. (wikipedia)

Rather than giving my point of view of how I see divorce, I decided to go out and see how others felt about this topic. Divorce is a very sensitive issue, so I had to find the correct person for the job. It took me a couple of days, but a friend that I have met in my first year of school was up for the task. His name is Mark and his parents have been divorced since he was an infant. To be exact, they got divorced when he was only three months old. Due to the fact that he was only 3 months old when this occurred, I had to restrict some of the questions which I thought were the most important.

I began by asking Mark how his life has been affected by his parents’ divorce. He answered by saying, “You basically have to listen to one person. You can only get one opinion, and that’s from the person that you live with. I think that it totally contradicts what a family should be. In a family, both parents have a say on what the regulations should be and how the rules should be set.” Mark also claimed that when parents are divorced there are always certain changes. You get to see how different both of the parents are. Mark says, “My mom is the total opposite from my dad. If I like something, no matter the price, my mom would say that it’s mine and she would get it for me. Now on the other hand, if I was with my dad it would be totally different. If I liked something and I wanted it, I would need the approval of my dad because if he doesn’t like it then there isn’t a good chance of me getting that.” I then decided to ask him if the divorce was best for both of his parents. When I asked him that he quickly responded with a Yes. At a time, he went to live with his dad for a while and said that it wasn’t the same as living with his mother. He said that it was easier adapting with his mother because it is much easier to get along with her.

When parents are divorced and no longer live with each other, it is hard for them to get together on occasions for their children. There is a weird vibe between both of them and the outcome isn’t usually good. Mark told me a story of how his parents weren’t getting along at his high school graduation, and literally made it a “living hell” for him. From past experiences, it is safe to say that I and many others can relate to this.

Usually in a divorce the mother gets custody of the children. Sometimes this might not be the case. There have been situations where the father receives custody of the child. This may be due to the fact that the mother is in no condition to care for children or circumstances of that nature. In Mark’s case his mother had full custody of him. He says that he was better off living with his mother because they have a great relationship and it is very easy for them to get along with each other. His mother is very open with him and he feels that if he were to live with his father, things wouldn’t be same.

The final question that I had for Mark was one that I think was very important. I asked him how his parents felt about each other. At first he hesitated, but finally answered by saying, “I think that my dad has some issues about the way that my mother raises me. He feels that my mother is doing wrong by buying me all of the things that she buys me. But my mother doesn’t care and she says that the way she raises me is the right way. My mother and I know that I wouldn’t be able to live with my father, so right now I’m fine with the way that I’m living.”
After finding out how Mark felt about these things, I decided to go out and interview someone whose parents are not divorced. I really wanted to get the best of both worlds and this was the way to do it. The person who I interviewed was a good cousin of mine named John. John and I have been best friends since the day that we were born, but I never really knew how he felt about his parents and this was the best time for me to find out. As I mentioned before his parents are currently together with four kids. I called him over the phone and I asked John how his relationship was with both of his parents living together. He answered by saying, “I think that I have the best parents in the world. They are great people and I can’t see myself living without either of them. I don’t even want to know what it would be like if they were to get a divorce because it would be very hard on me.” John says that his parents get along great. He knows that they have a lot of love for each other just by the way the act around the house. While laughing he said that he can always feel the love in the house when they aren’t home. Like my friend Mark said, a good relationship is found where two people are able to talk with each other and both of them are considerate of each other. This is what John’s parents do best and it might be the reason that they are so happy and not divorced.

I then decided to go out on a limb, and I asked him how things would change if his parents were to get divorced. “If they were to get divorced, my family would not be able to function right. My brothers and I would be lost without one of them” he replied. This doesn’t always happen when parents get divorced but there is still a good chance of it happening. He summed it all up by saying that he feels bad for families who are divorced. He says that he just can’t see one parent raising a child or children the same way both parents can.

Doing this interview opened my eyes for me. I was so narrow headed before, thinking that divorce wasn’t necessary. I thought that if two people got married and had children during their marriage, divorce was totally out of the picture. But these to gentlemen showed me that divorce is necessary in some situations. When my parents got divorced I immediately blamed it on one of the parents. I’m not going to mention which parent it was. Now I can’t lie, I held a grudge on one of them for a very long time. It was wrong to do that but now I know that people get divorce for the better of things. My parents got divorced because they weren’t happy with each other anymore. Why would you be with someone that doesn’t make you happy anymore? I finally see what happened between both of them and I am very disappointed that it took me this long to realize it. I really can’t be mad at myself because you live and you learn. The older you get the wiser you get. I guess that I was just being hard headed before because I knew that I wouldn’t see my father as much as I used too.

Basically, the reason I decided to write this report on divorce was because I don’t really talk about it with others. I feel that I had to get all of this off my chest and share it with other people. By the way I’m writing it may seem like I’m just feeling bad for myself. You should now the answer and if you don’t know it’s, that I’m not feeling bad for myself. I know that there are tons of kids that are in my shoes and maybe if they read this, some way it can help them out. Hopefully if I ever get married and have kids, I don’t want my kids to go through what I have gone through.